Are you someone who walks into a room and instantly starts comparing yourself, your body, your skin, your outfit, to everyone around you?
You’re not alone. I used to do the same thing. For years, I believed being attractive meant being the prettiest, fittest, or most put-together woman in the room.
But recently, on an episode of In Your Skin, I talked about something that completely shifted how I see beauty and attraction, and I wanted to share it here too. Because true attraction has very little to do with how you look… and everything to do with your energy.
A study in the British Journal of Psychology found that what draws people in goes far beyond physical appearance. We’re influenced by someone’s energy, tone of voice, body language, even how they move through a room. In other words, it’s not about your face, it’s about your frequency.
So, if you’ve ever wondered why some people have that unexplainable “it” factor that glow that draws others in, it’s not luck or genetics. It’s something you can cultivate. Here are five ways to become magnetic from the inside out.
1. Build Your Self-Worth (Stop Outsourcing Your Value)
The most magnetic women know their worth comes from within. They don’t need validation to feel valuable, they are valuable.
When you stop outsourcing your self-worth to how others see you, your energy stabilises. You move differently. You speak differently.
Start small, write down what you love about yourself, celebrate your wins, and remind yourself that confidence isn’t loud… it’s grounded self-trust.
2. Move Your Body For Energy, Not Aesthetics
Movement is one of the fastest ways to shift your energy.
When you move your body with intention, whether it’s walking, dancing, yoga, or pilates, you reconnect to your feminine flow.
This isn’t about burning calories or changing how you look; it’s about coming home to yourself. When you feel embodied, you radiate presence.
3. Speak Kindly to Yourself
Your inner dialogue becomes your energetic signature.
If your self-talk is full of judgment or comparison, that energy seeps into how you show up. Start rewriting the script. Replace criticism with compassion.
Try saying, “I’m proud of myself,” or “I’m growing every day.” The kinder you are to yourself, the more magnetic you become.
4. Nurture Your Passions
People who are passionate are naturally magnetic.
When you’re doing what you love, your eyes light up, your energy expands, and people feel that. Whether it’s creating, learning, cooking, or building something meaningful, follow what excites you. Passion is the ultimate glow-up.
5. Protect Your Energy
Being magnetic isn’t about giving your energy to everyone, it’s about being intentional with it. Set boundaries. Spend time with people who inspire and uplift you. Say no when something doesn’t feel right. When you honour your energy, it strengthens your presence, and that’s when people can truly feel your power.
Remember: You attract what you feel about yourself.
When you love and trust yourself first, the world can’t help but feel that too.